New invention
Written by BUDDY on 22.34Now the world has change, scientist from foreign country found new source to make gasoline for your car, here is the sample.
And what you were thinking, you want to hit yor boss.
Now the world has change, scientist from foreign country found new source to make gasoline for your car, here is the sample.
> 1. Women are unpredictable.
>
> Before marriage, she expects a man,
> after marriage she suspects him,
> and after death she respects him.
> --------
> 2. There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much
> They got married - and now he is going thru hell.
> --------
> 3. A man inserted an `ad' in the classifieds :
> "Wife wanted ". Next day, he received a hundred letters.
> They all said the same thing :
> "You can have mine."
> --------
> 4. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure
> of one thing:
> either the car is new or the wife.
> --------
> 5. It's easy to tell if a man is married or not.
> Just watch him drive a car with a woman sitting beside him. If both his hands are on the wheel, you can be sure he is married.
> --------
> 6. A man received a letter
> from some Kidnappers. The letter said, " if you don't promised to send us $100,000 I swear that we will kidnap your wife."
> The poor man wrote back, " I am afraid I can't keep my promise but I hope you will keep yours."
> --------
> 7. What's the matter,
>
> you look depressed." "I'm having trouble with my wife."
> "What happened?" "She said she wasn't going to speak to me for 30 days."
> "But that ought to make you happy."
> "It did, but today is the last day."
> --------
> 8.WOMAN
>
> When she is 18 - She is a football, 22 men going after her.
> When she is 28 - She is a hockey ball, 8 men going after her.
> When she is 38 - She is a golf ball, 1 man hitting on her.
> When she is 48 - She is a pingpong ball, 2 men pushing to each other.
> --------
> 9.MAN
>
> At 20 - A man is like a coconut, so much to offer, so little to give.
> At 30 - He is like a durian, dangerous but delicious.
> At 40 - He is like a watermelon, big, round and juicy.
> At 50 - He is like a mandarin orange, the season comes once in a year.
> At 60 - He is just like a raisin, dried out, wrinkles and cheap.
> --------
> 10.Marriage Humour
> In the beginning, God created earth and rested.
> Then God created man and rested.
> Then God created woman.
> Since then, neither God nor man has rested.
>
Bgai anda yang menyukai tantangan baru mungkin ini akan menjadi pilihan anda, TAPI .. HATI-HATI...............
KATANYA PEMILIK HIBURAN INI TIDAK MENYEDIAKAN ASURANSI BAGI PENGUNJUNGNYA..
Mungkin bagi karyawan di gedung bertingkat yang bercakar...%$#^% pencakar langit, terkadang merasa jenuh ketika menunggu di dalam hingga ke lantai yang dituju. Mungkin tips ini bisa membantu anda untu mengurangi kejenuhan anda.
1. Ketika anda hanya berdua dengan orang tak dikenal, colek bahunya! Kemudian anda pura-pura melihat ke tempat lain..
2. Tekan tombol lift kemudian anda pura-pura kesetrum. Tersenyumlah lalu….. ulangi lagi.
3. Gunakan HP anda untuk telpon ke Psikolog sambil bertanya apakah dia tahu di lantai berapa anda sekarang ?
4. Bawalah kamera dan ambillah gambar semua orang yang ada di dalam lift.
5. Pindahkan meja kerja anda ke dalam lift. Jika ada yang masuk, tanyakan apakah mereka sudah membuat janji?
6. Bentangkan papan catur di lantai lift dan ajaklah orang-orang,barangkali ada yang mau main.
7. Letakkan sebuah bungkusan di pojok, jika ada yang masuk, tanyakan apakah mereka mendengar suara tik…tik…tik…
8. Anda pura-pura jadi pramugari! Tunjukkan prosedur keselamatan penerbangan seperti di dalam pesawat terbang.
9. Ketika pintu menutup, beri pengumuman kepada orang-orang. Tenang,jangan panik, nanti pasti terbuka lagi koq!
10. Pasanglah muka menyeringai kesakitan sambil memegangi kepala anda dan mengumpat: Diam, semuanya diam!
11. Bukalah tas anda, sambil melihat ke dalam tas, tanyalah: Udaranya cukup nggak disitu?
12. Bila pengguna lift lebih dari 5 orang tutuplah hidung anda sambil melihat orang – orang disekeliling anda.
13. Bawalah wayang golek atau wayang kulit, gunakan wayang itu untuk ngobrol dengan orang di dekat anda.
14. Dengarkan suara didinding lift dengan stetoskop.
15. Buatlah garis di lantai sekeliling anda menggunakan kapur, lalu bilang: "Ini adalah wilayah SAYA."
SAYA TAU APA YANG ADA DI PIKIRAN ANDA
TIPS YANG ANEH.... ANEH... ANEH
Have you ever dream to have a carrier woman wife, well be carrefull with your wish. Your wife is not going to care of you. But there ia a benefit of it, we can find another woman but as a single man.
> "We will do it" means " You will do it"
>
> "You have done a great job" means "More work to be given to you"
>
> "We are working on it" means "We have not yet started working on the same" "Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means "Its not getting done... At least not tomorrow !".
>
> "After discussion we will decide - I am very open to views" means "I have already decided, I will tell you what to do"
> "There was a slight miscommunication" means "We had actually lied"
>
> "Lets call a meeting and discuss" means "I have no time now, will talk later"
>
> "We can always do it" means "We actually cannot do the same on time"
>
> "We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline" means "The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time"
>
> "We had slight differences of opinion" means "We had actually fought"
>
> "Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you" means "Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"
>
> "You should have told me earlier" means "Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!"
>
> "We need to find out the real reason" means "Well I will tell you where your fault is"
>
> "Well... family is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected" means "Well you know..."
>
> "We are a team" means "I am not the only one to be blamed"
>
> "That's actually a good question" means "I do not know anything about it"
>
> "All the Best" means " You are in trouble"
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Ok this is the indonesia version,
Saya menggunakan alat ini untuk menghilangkan password data di PDF files. Akhirnya saya menemukan tools ini, password nya saya hilangkan terlebih dahulu kemudian, di convert ke microsoft word dengan ABBY transformer. Bagi anda yang mengalami hal yang sama silahkan coba tool ini
Orang Bodoh vs Orang Pinter
1. Orang bodoh sulit dapat kerja, akhirnya dia bisnis.
Agar bisnisnya berhasil, tentu dia harus rekrut orang
Pintar. Walhasil Bosnya orang pintar adalah orang
bodoh.
2. Orang bodoh sering melakukan kesalahan, maka dia
rekrut orang pintar yang tidak pernah salah untuk
memperbaiki yang salah. Walhasil orang bodoh
memerintahkan orang pintar untuk keperluan orang
bodoh.
3. Orang pintar belajar untuk mendapatkan ijazah untuk
selanjutnya mendapatkan kerja. Orang bodoh berpikir
secepatnya mendapatkan uang untuk membayari proposal
yang diajukan orang pintar.
4. Orang bodoh tidak bisa membuat teks pidato, maka
disuruh orang pintar untuk membuatnya.
5. Orang Bodoh kayaknya susah untuk lulus sekolah
hukum (SH). oleh karena itu orang bodoh memerintahkan
orang pintar untuk membuat undang-undangnya orang
bodoh.
6. Orang bodoh biasanya jago cuap-cuap jual omongan,
sementara itu orang pintar percaya. Tapi selanjutnya
orang pintar menyesal karena telah mempercayai orang
bodoh. Tapi toh saat itu orang bodoh sudah ada di
atas.
7. Orang bodoh berpikir pendek untuk memutuskan
sesuatu di dipikirkan panjang-panjang oleh orang
pintar, walhasil orang orang pintar menjadi staffnya
orang bodoh.
8. Saat bisnis orang bodoh mengalami kelesuan, dia PHK
orang-orang pintar yang berkerja. Tapi orang-orang
pintar DEMO, Walhasil orang-orang pintar
"meratap-ratap" kepada orang bodoh agar tetap di
berikan pekerjaan.
9. Tapi saat bisnis orang bodoh maju, orang pinter
akan menghabiskan waktu untuk bekerja keras dengan
hati senang, sementara orang bodoh menghabiskan waktu
untuk bersenang-senang dengan keluarganya.
10. Mata orang bodoh selalu mencari apa yang bisa di
jadikan duit. Mata orang pintar selalu mencari kolom
lowongan perkerjaan.
11. Bill gate (Microsoft), Dell, Hendri (Ford), Thomas
Alfa Edison, Liem Siu Liong (BCA group) adalah
orang-orang Bodoh (tidak pernah dapat S1) yang kaya.
Ribuan orang-orang pintar bekerja untuk mereka. Dan
puluhan ribu jiwa keluarga orang pintar bergantung
pada orang bodoh.
12. Orang bodoh sok pinter, dan orang pinter
dibodoh-bodoh in.
Pada saat tragedi WTC 9/11 yang banyak memakan korban orang amerika ternyata ada orang Indonesia yang selamat dari peristiwa tersebut.
Hal tersebut menarik perhatian Oprah untuk mewawancarai orang Indonesia yang selamat itu:
Oprah: "Anda luar biasa sekali. Bagaimana anda bisa selamat dari reruntuhan gedung WTC tersebut?"
Orang Indonesia : hhehehe biasa mbak, pas hari itu kita mau kerja, seperti biasa kita dateng telat..pas sampe disana ngga taunya gedungnya udah ngga ada....(sambil cengar-cengir)
Oprah: ?????
Subject: Hidup Indonesia !!!
* Ada pejabat indo berkunjung ke china n bertamu ke rumah pejabat cina.
Indo : "Rumah elo bagus banget~!! Gaji elo kan ga segede gini, gimana lo bisa bangun rumah sebagus ini?"
China :"ikut gua ke balkon.Liat tuh jembatan (nunjuk jembatan)"
Indo:"emang napa tuh jembatan?"
China :"10% dana tuh jembatan masuk ke kantong gua makanya gua bisa bangunrumah keren kayak gini."
Sebulan kemudian gantian pejabat china yg dateng ke tempat si pejabat indo.
China kaget ," gila rumah elo bagus banget padahal gaji elo kan lebih kecil dr gua"
Indo:"mau tau? ikut gua ke balkon. Liat tuh bendungan~!! "
China bingung, "Mana bendungannya? "
Indo:"emang kaga ada, kan dana bendungannya masuk kantong gua semua,jadi kaga gua bangun".
GUYS ...... YOU SHOULD TRY THIS ... ITS... COOL..
THERE IS A CHICK INSIDE THERE.. ITS GORGEOUS ..
HURRY UPP TIMES ITS RUNNIN OUTT.........
Do you think you've already use 100% features using the HP brand, well this demonstration show you how to do it.. I guest Not Yet, i guaranteeAs a waiting chair
As a punishment gear
As a peanut breaker
As a dump trash
As a kick target
To kill a fly
As a bat
As a llightning
To Show a direction
Or for describing circles
BAGI ANDA YANG BERPERUT BESAR INI MUNGKIN JALAN KELUARNYA
How to make your stomach streamline, here are some idea could make it....
Warning, i am not guarantee anything here
Siapkan sedotan
get some straw
Potong 5 cm
Cut abot 5 cm
Ratakan
Make it flat
Tutup sebelah dengan isolasi
Stick half the hole with seal tape
Tahan nafas dalam-dalam lalu tiup sekuatnya selama 5 detik
Take a deep breath and blow it hard about 5 second
Lakukan 3 menit sehari
Do 3 minute a day
Poinya meniup sekuatnya selama 5 detik
the point is blow it hard about 5 second long
setelah 2 minggu perut mengecil, hasil berbeda pada tiap orang
After 2 weeks, your stomach will smaller, different people has a different result
Menurut pakar otot perut lebih digunakan ketika mengeluarkan nafas dari pada menarik
Expert says stomach muscle more use when you breathe out then inhale
Penggunaan sedotan separuh ditutup, efek penggunaanotot perut lebih maksimal
using a half close straws, will maximize the utitlity of stomach muscle
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Bagi anda yang ingin mengkonversi file berupa PDF files, software ini salah satu pilihan yang tepat, saya sendiri pernah mengkonversi halaman di PDF files ingga 1500-an lembar tanpa ada masalah.Nama lahir | Agnes Monica Muljoto |
---|---|
Lahir | 1 Juli 1986 (umur 22) |
Nama lain | Agnes Monica |
Genre | Pop, R&B, Hip Hop |
Pekerjaan | penyanyi, aktris |
Tahun aktif | 1994 - sekarang |
Perusahaan rekaman | Aquarius Musikindo |
Orang tua | Jenny Siswono |
Situs resmi | http://www.agnezone.com |